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WORK TITLE: Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents
WORK NOTES:
PSEUDONYM(S):
BIRTHDATE: 1955?
WEBSITE: http://iriswaichler.com/
CITY: Chicago
STATE: IL
COUNTRY: United States
NATIONALITY:
RESEARCHER NOTES:
PERSONAL
Born 1955; married; husband’s name Steve; children: Grace.
ADDRESS
CAREER
Teacher, speaker, author, clinical social worker, and patient advocate. RESOLVE volunteer.
AVOCATIONS:Being with family and friends, traveling.
WRITINGS
Contributor to periodicals, including MindBodygreen.com, Parade, and Redbook.
SIDELIGHTS
Iris Waichler works primarily within the medical field, with her specialty being social work. For decades she has served as a clinical social worker and patient advocate, aiding patients and their loved ones with coping with their illness. Waichler has also written numerous pieces about her subject of expertise. Much of her work can be read on Mindbodygreen.com and similar publications.
Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster
Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide To Educate And Inspire serves as Waichler’s first full-fledged book. It focuses on Waichler’s experiences within the medical field, both personally and professionally. However, some of Waichler’s experiences as a professional helping other people grapple with their infertility also feature within the book. Waichler addresses the toll infertility can take upon a person’s health on both a mental and physical scale.
She goes on to discuss many other issues that are deeply related to infertility, such as the choice between whether to keep pursuing parenthood or to not have any children; menopause and how it can affect life; choosing the best possible medical professional to help with infertility treatments; and more. A reviewer in an issue of Small Press Bookwatch felt that the book should be “very strongly recommended for couples searching for a comprehensive grasp of infertility issues.”
Role Reversal
Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents also draws extensively from Waichler’s personal experiences as a caretaker for her own parents as they grew older and their health began to fail. Waichler uses both personal anecdotes and professional information to guide readers on the best and healthiest way to approach taking care of elderly loved ones—for both the person being cared for as well as the caretaker themselves. The book splits into two halves, with the first addressing the time Waichler spent taking care of her father and mother in their later years. She encourages readers to keep the well being of their parent(s) in mind, but also to be as respectful of them as possible. The second half of the book digs caregiving from a legal perspective.
One Publishers Weekly contributor felt that Role Reversal “offers the reader a sense of speaking to a well-informed and personally invested friend rather than an impersonal medical professional.” In an issue of Clarion Reviews, Paige Van De Winkle remarked: “Waichler’s personal approach to the subject is humanizing and contextualizes the plethora of useful resources she packs in.” She added: “Iris Waichler’s Role Reversal is an informative and empathetic guide on how to best care for aging parents.”
BIOCRIT
PERIODICALS
Clarion Reviews, December 22, 2016, Paige Van De Winkle, review of Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents.
Publishers Weekly, September 4, 2017, review of Role Reversal, p. 85.
Small Press Bookwatch, June, 2006, review of Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide To Educate And Inspire.
ONLINE
Booksparks, https://gobooksparks.com/ (May 15, 2018), author profile.
Foreword Reviews, https://www.forewordreviews.com/ (December 22, 2016), Paige Van De Winkle, review of Role Reversal.
In the News, http://heavenonearthsystem.blogspot.com/ (February 14, 2011), Don McCauley, “An Interview With Iris Waichler, Author Of Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster.”
Iris Waichler Website, http://iriswaichler.com (May 15, 2018), author profile.
Jewish Women’s Archive, https://jwa.org/ (August 4, 2016), Bella Book, “The Sandwich Generation: An Interview with Author Iris Waichler.”
L.A.Meredith, LLC, http://lameredith.com/ (May 23, 2016), Lizbeth Meredith, “Interview with Iris Waichler, Author of Role Reversal, How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents.”
Iris Waichler has been a well known patient advocate and licensed clinical social worker for the last 40 years. She began her career working with geriatric patients who experienced catastrophic illness and counseled them and their families about adapting to these medical problems. She helped them understand their medical condition helping them to cope with the disease and its impact on their lives.
She is an award winning author. In addition she is a prominent speaker presenting on topics related to infertility and caregiving. She has appeared in magazines like Redbook, Parade, MindBodygreen.com. She also has done many radio shows and podcasts.
Iris has taught and supervised social work students, medical students, interns, residents, and nurses about patient rights, ethics.
Ms. Waichler found herself in the role of a patient when she battled infertility for many years. The feelings of loss and helplessness she personally experienced were profound. She promised herself if she was successful in having a child she would do everything she could to help other people fighting infertility.
She authored a second award winning book, RIDING THE INFERTILITY ROLLER COASTER, A GUIDE TO EDUCATE AND INSPIRE. This book won 4 awards including 2 best book of the year awards. The response was so great she began doing individual and group counseling with people who had infertility. She volunteered for RESOLVE, a national infertility group, and went on to do a series of radio interviews, magazine articles, workshops, and speeches on infertility topics.
Her book, ROLE REVERSAL, HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR AGING PARENTS, has won 5 major book awards. Her experience in caring for her beloved father, who died at age 97, triggered her passion in reaching out to others who suddenly find themselves in a caregiver role and are uncertain about what to do or where to go for help. In this book she shares her father’s inspiring story and her personal and professional experience in assuming the challenges that come with being a caregiver for an aging loved one.
Iris has been doing freelance writing for the last 17 years. The focus of her work has been on health related topics.
Ms. Waichler lives in Chicago with her husband, Steve, and her daughter, Grace and her mini golden doodle Brandi. She loves to travel whenever she can and to spend time with friends and family.
Iris Waichler has been a well known patient advocate and licensed clinical social worker for the last 40 years. She began her career working with geriatric patients who experienced catastrophic illness and counseled them and their families about adapting to these medical problems. She helped them understand their medical condition and counseled them about how to cope with the disease and its impact on their lives.
She continued to work on a rehabilitation unit in a large Chicago teaching hospital with patients who had suffered traumatic brain injuries, strokes, cancer, amputations, burns, and neurological diseases like multiple sclerosis and parkinson’s disease. Ms. Waichler also covered the emergency room for 13 years seeing patients of all ages with a variety of medical problems. In addition she worked with kids who had been victims of child abuse.
Her long term hospital work gave her insights into how overwhelming it was for patients and families who suddenly found themselves in a hospital setting feeling helpless and alone. This prompted her to write her first book, Patient Power: How to Have a Say in Your Hospital Stay. She understood that if people knew what questions to ask and where to go for support, it would help empower them and assist them in coping with their medical conditions and the resulting life changes.
She used these insights to supervise social work students, and teach medical students, interns, residents, and nurses about patient rights, ethics, and to help them become more empathetic and effective in their day to day patient and family care.
Ms. Waichler found herself in the role of a patient when she battled infertility for many years. The feelings of loss and helplessness she personally experienced were profound. She promised herself if she was successful in having a child she would do everything she could to help other people fighting infertility.
She authored a second award winning book, Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide to Educate and Inspire. This book won 2 best book of the year awards. The response was so great she began doing individual and group counseling with people who had infertility. She volunteered for RESOLVE, a national infertility group, and went on to do a series of radio interviews, magazine articles, workshops, and speeches designed to inform and support men and women with infertility.
In writing her new book,Role Reversal: Taking Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents, Ms. Waichler has come full circle. Her experience in caring for her beloved father, who died at age 97, triggered her passion in reaching out to others who suddenly find themselves in a caregiver role and are uncertain about what to do or where to go for help. In this book she shares her father’s inspiring story and her personal and professional experience in assuming the challenges that come with being a caregiver for an aging loved one.
Iris has been doing freelance writing for the last 15 years. The focus of her work has been on health related topics and assisting her readers gain knowledge that helps them feel less alone and empowers them in significant new ways.
Ms. Waichler lives in Chicago with her husband, Steve, and her daughter, Grace. She loves to travel whenever she can and to spend time with friends and family.
Iris Waichler has been a well known patient advocate and licensed clinical social worker for the last 35 years. She began her career working with geriatric patients who experienced catastrophic illness and counseled them and their families about adapting to these medical problems. She helped them understand their medical condition and counseled them about how to cope with the disease and its impact on their lives.
She continued to work on a rehabilitation unit in a large Chicago teaching hospital with patients who had suffered traumatic brain injuries, strokes, cancer, amputations, burns, and neurological diseases like multiple sclerosis and parkinson’s disease. Ms. Waichler also covered the emergency room for 13 years seeing patients of all ages with a variety of medical problems. In addition she worked with kids who had been victims of child abuse.
Her long term hospital work gave her insights into how overwhelming it was for patients and families who suddenly found themselves in a hospital setting feeling helpless and alone. This prompted her to write her first book, Patient Power: How to Have a Say in Your Hospital Stay. She understood that if people knew what questions to ask and where to go for support, it would help empower them and assist them in coping with their medical conditions and the resulting life changes.
She used these insights to supervise social work students, and teach medical students, interns, residents, and nurses about patient rights, ethics, and to help them become more empathetic and effective in their day to day patient and family care.
Ms. Waichler found herself in the role of a patient when she battled infertility for many years. The feelings of loss and helplessness she personally experienced were profound. She promised herself if she was successful in having a child she would do everything she could to help other people fighting infertility.
She authored a second award winning book, Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide to Educate and Inspire. This book won 2 best book of the year awards. The response was so great she began doing individual and group counseling with people who had infertility. She volunteered for RESOLVE, a national infertility group, and went on to do a series of radio interviews, magazine articles, workshops, and speeches designed to inform and support men and women with infertility.
In writing her new book, Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging, Ms. Waichler has come full circle. Her experience in caring for her beloved father, who died at age 97, triggered her passion in reaching out to others who suddenly find themselves in a caregiver role and are uncertain about what to do or where to go for help. In this book she shares her father’s inspiring story and her personal and professional experience in assuming the challenges that come with being a caregiver for an aging loved one.
Iris has been doing freelance writing for the last 15 years. The focus of her work has been on health related topics and assisting her readers gain knowledge that helps them feel less alone and empowers them in significant new ways.
Ms. Waichler lives in Chicago with her husband, Steve, and her daughter, Grace. She loves to travel whenever she can and to spend time with friends and family.
August 4, 2016
The Sandwich Generation: An Interview with Author Iris Waichler
by Bella Book
Recently, the Pew Research Center has found that in 2013, 47% of adults, ages 40-59, had both a parent who was sixty-five or older and children they were still financially supporting. This group, called the “Sandwich Generation,” will only grow larger as people live longer and have children later. The responsibility of taking care of elderly parents often falls on daughters who are also mothers and professionals. JWA spoke to author, social worker, and patient advocate Iris Waichler about her new book, out August 16th, Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parent, and the different ways you can support your parents, your family, and yourself.
Q: What prompted this book in this particular moment?
A: I began writing this book four years ago. Originally, it was going to be a memoir about my father. He was a wonderful man who had been a caregiver all of his life. As I began discussing the book, everyone I spoke with had a story about taking care of their parents. I wanted to offer readers current content that addressed the most challenging aspects of caregiving for a parent, while also sharing my own experience as the caregiving daughter of an aging parent. I decided to blend my personal experience and my forty years of professional expertise as a medical social worker/patient advocate.
Q: With more and more people anticipating taking care of elderly parents, what advice would you give on how they can best plan ahead and communicate with their parents about the future?
A: That is a great question. I talk a lot about being proactive. I recommend sitting down and having a candid discussion when the parents are healthy and thinking clearly. Ask your parents what type of help they envision needing as they age and begin to develop problems with mobility or memory. Do they plan on staying in their home or would they consider moving somewhere else? How would they feel about a family member helping with their care? Which family member do they envision doing it? Is that person okay with the role? Another huge issue is estate planning.
Make sure health directives are in place. This means signed legal documents outlining what the parent’s wishes are if they cannot decide their own medical care. Discuss whether they want a do-not-resuscitate order. It is a huge gift to you, as the caregiver, if you know this information. In a crisis you want to understand their insurance coverage, finances, and where this information is located.
Iris Waichler and Book Cover, 2016
Full image
Author and Patient Advocate, Iris Waichler, 2016.
Q: In your professional and personal experience, what are the common ways that aging parents react to this shift in their parent-child relationship? How can a child help preserve their parent’s dignity while also ensuring they get the care they need?
A: A lot depends on the previous relationships that were established before this ultimate role reversal happens. If the previous relationship is positive, it tends to go more smoothly because there is mutual respect, love, and trust. If the previous parent-child relationship was abusive or negative in some way, that can impact this shift in roles and makes it more difficult and complicated. Dignity is a huge issue when you are helping your parent with very intimate tasks like bathing, going to the bathroom, and dressing. I advise adult children to openly talk with their parent about what might feel mutually uncomfortable. If possible, get a non-family member to help with these tasks.
Q: When it comes to taking care of elderly parents, what advice do you have?
A: First, I would say, remember you bring your past relationships with your family into your role as caregiver. If there were previously unresolved conflicts, they may rise up when your roles are reversed. Consider that before you take on this role, and ask yourself, are you the best person for the job? Secondly, as much as possible, mutual respect, and dignity, need to be in place for both your parent and you, as the caregiver. This is one of the toughest aspects of the role reversal. Seeing your parent be this vulnerable is painful for all concerned. Thirdly, caregiving responsibilities can tear families apart…My book has a chapter on building a support network. It is critical for siblings to sit down with their parents and identify what help is needed, how often they will need assistance, and who has the skills to offer that help. Even if a sibling is geographically distant, that person may be able to help with managing insurance or hospital bills. Set up a plan and set up a date, (no more than three months later), where you can get together and evaluate how it is working and what additional support needs to be put in place.
Q: Jewish poet,Lesléa Newman once wrote, “a daughter’s a daughter for all of her life.” Do you think the expectations people have about daughters and family affect decisions around caretaking and who should take responsibility?
A: Yes, I do. The National Alliance for Caregiving reports the average caregiver is a forty-nine-year-old woman who is working full time and married with children. The Family Caregiver Alliance says 75% of all caregivers are women. I do believe family expectations influence decisions about care taking. Most of the time, the daughter volunteers. That, in combination with family relationships and culture, helps determine who will be responsible and how caregiving tasks and roles are decided.
Q: What was it like for you to have both a child at home and a father who needed more care and attention? Was it difficult being both a mother and a daughter at once? How did you juggle and/or prioritize those roles?
A: It was a challenge. I am incredibly lucky to have a supportive husband who helped with both my dad and my daughter. I also don’t have the demands of a full time job. Juggle is a good word. My dad was the priority during the health crisis and the final days of his life. I always tried to make time to spend with my daughter as much as I could but I did feel guilty I could not be with my daughter in the way that I wanted. Balancing your role as both a daughter and a parent is one of the toughest challenges related to caregiving.
Q: How do you think Jewish ideas of family and history affect the way that Jewish children take care of their elderly parents?
A: I think there is obviously a strong sense of family commitment and sacrifice in Jewish tradition. It certainly is in my family. When I was growing up, we had my three grandparents live with us and my parents took care of them until they died. There is not a question of, “Will I take this on?” but more, “What can I do to make this caregiving role work?”
Q: What are the key ways that people can maintain self-care while taking care of a parent?
A: I just wrote an article about this that will be out soon! The top four tips that I gave were:
Allow yourself to feel the loss of the parent you knew. Ignoring feelings can cause burnout, anger, and more stress.
Ask for help when you need it. Most people who are caregivers wait too long, and it takes such an emotional and physical toll that you lose yourself and other areas of your life that are meaningful and nourishing.
Identify someone you trust and can talk candidly with as you maintain your caregiver role. If you don’t have that person, find a healthcare professional who specializes in grief and loss.
Finally, you must make time to be with people and do things that you enjoy, things that nourish and energize you. Do it without feeling guilty!
Iris Waichler, MSW, LCSW has been a licensed clinical social worker and patient advocate for 40 years. Her new book, Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents, will be released August 16, 2016. Her previous book, Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide to Educate and Inspire, won 4 major book awards. She has authored hundreds of articles on healthcare and patient advocacy topics. You can learn more about Ms. Waichler at her website: http://iriswaichler.com/
Interview with Iris Waichler, Author of Role Reversal, How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents
May 23, 2016 by lameredith
Chances are if that if you have aging parents, you’ll need to learn how to best care for them as their age increases and their needs change.
Role Reversal
With the increasing number of adults living beyond their 70’s, their middle-aged adult children are often left to navigate the challenging role of care provider.
Today, author Iris Waichler talks about her past experience caring for her aging father and the lessons learned and shared in her book Role Reversal, How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents.
Welcome, Iris!
Q&A
Was there a pivotal moment when You knew you must write Role Reversal?
Yes. One day I realized that countless people around me had been talking about their struggles around health crisis their parents were having. The recurring theme was they were uncertain about what to do and overwhelmed. I have been a medical social worker for 40 years.
My father was ninety and I quickly noticed something was wrong, his balance and memory were off. I took him to the doctor right away and we learned he had a brain hemorrhage. He had surgery and made a full recovery. It got me thinking that if people knew what to look for they could be proactive and mange care challenges in more productive ways. I decided to use my dad’s story as a springboard to help others.
You have written 2 other books. One of them won multiple awards. How did the process differ when writing this book? What difference was working with a hybrid publisher like She Writes Press?
This book was very challenging because I was writing my father’s life story and the story of
my family. It was very personal. I wanted people to see that sometimes people can appear
ordinary by society standards and do extraordinary things. I also wanted to make sure my
siblings were OK with my sharing our family experience.
I love the hybrid publishing model. It has been a perfect fit for me. She Writes Press offers the expertise of
traditional publishing with high quality design team and distribution options. Brooke Warner,
SWP publisher, is very hands on. She guides her authors through every step of the process. I also
really enjoy the opportunity to share ideas, successes, and resources with my talented colleagues.
You don’t find that in other publishing models.
iris
Author Iris Waichler
What chapter was the most challenging to write?
The most difficult chapter for me to write was called “No Mas” which means no more in
Spanish. It is the story of letting go of my father and facing his death. He used to say no mas
when he was eating and didn’t want any more food. He had a swallowing problem because of his medical condition. It was so painful to even think about. I could not begin to write it until a
couple of months after his death.
What are the top 3 tips you share with readers in Role Reversal? What was the most difficult
you to follow as you cared for your father?
One of the most difficult things for people to do is estate planning. Nobody wants to think about
death or talk about it. If you know what your parents wishes are regarding health directives, and
what insurance and assets they have, that information can guide you as a caregiver. I interview an
estate planning expert who shared his recommendations.
A very challenging aspect of caregiving is identifying caregiver roles and sharing responsibilities
with siblings or other family. This can cause so many problems and can dissolve relationships. I
explain how to approach this challenge and to build a support team with family.
As a social worker I am interested in grief, loss, and relationships. This ultimate role reversal
where adult children parent their parents comes with a lot of emotional baggage from the past. I
reveal how these past relationships impact your current caregiver relationship and how to
incorporate this in your caregiver plan.
I am incredibly lucky. My relationships with my father and my siblings were very good. My dad
trusted me. We discussed his wishes about health directives, his financial situation, and he made
me executor and gave me power of attorney. When decisions needed to be made and I had to set
up his care and arrange his funeral, he gave me everything I needed. It was such a gift to me and
my siblings. I didn’t have any of the challenges of those 3 tips.
How can readers best connect with you?
My website is iriswaichler.wpengine.com I also offer lots of resource information on my
Facebook page @ RoleReversal1
Iris Waichler is the author of Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide to Educate and Inspire
MONDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2011
An Interview With Iris Waichler, Author Of Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster
Recently I had the pleasure of interviewing Iris Waichler, author of 'Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster: a Guide to Educate and Inspire'. Iris wrote this book to help empower, educate, and support men and women who are engaged in their own battles with infertility. Iris has been a licensed clinical social worker for over 30 years and worked in hospitals for over 13 years. She is also the mother of a daughter that was conceived through infertility treatment.
Why did you decide to write Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster?
I don’t believe it makes sense to write a book on a topic that was already adequately addressed. I did the research and saw there were no published infertility books that discussed men and the way they coped with infertility. I also didn’t see books that combined the personal experience of men and women with a comprehensive range of topics to help people regardless where they were in their infertility treatment.
Who did you write this book for?
I wrote this book for men and women who are experiencing infertility and are not sure how to cope, or what their resources and choices are. I also wrote this book to help friends and family understand the devastating impact of infertility and learn how they can support loved ones through the infertility treatment process.
What specific benefits will your reader get from reading this book?
People who read my book will get information on how to choose legal, medical, and psychological support to combat their infertility. They will find information to help make necessary choices about treatment and other family building options. It helps the reader feel less alone and more in control of whatever decisions must be made.
What subjects does Riding the Infertility Roller Coaster cover?
The book covers a broad range of topics beginning with choosing a doctor, clinic, or lawyer. It covers family relationships and family building techniques like IVF, adoption, and surrogacy. I ask how do you know when to stop treatment? It also looks at parenting issues like becoming a couple, how infertility impacts parenting, and being older parents.
Who should buy this book?
My book is written for men and women who are experiencing infertility and are not certain what steps to take. It also offers valuable information for friends and family that will help strengthen relationships. The stress of infertility can destroy relationships.
You have experience writing 3 books, what is the process you use when beginning a new book?
The first thing I do when writing a book is spend time researching to ensure that I have something important to say that has not been said before. My books have an advocacy theme. I want to speak to the reader in new and creative ways and give them the tools they need to feel empowered enough to advocate for themselves.
What is different about your infertility book compared to other books on infertility?
My book is unique because I included interviews with both men and women. Men react differently to infertility. I also included a range of topics I had not seen elsewhere. I wanted to provide my reader the information they would need to go from the moment they learned they were infertile to becoming an older parent or knowing when to stop trying for a healthy pregnancy and learn alternatives!
You have experience writing 3 books, what is the process you use when beginning a new book?
When I write a book the first thing I do is a literature review to see what has been published and who the publishers are. I see how the market for that particular topic is. I must know I can offer something new and believe there is an audience for it. I write an outline about what I want to say and how I want to say it. Then I begin the writing.
What were the biggest challenges in getting your book published?
I wrote to over 50 publishers. Some had gone out of business. Several told me nobody cared about infertility. I knew that wasn’t true. I had to find a publisher that understood the importance of my topic and was willing to take a risk on me.
How did you find a publisher?
A friend gave me a copy of Brainchild Magazine and pointed to an article and said read it. It was about Nancy Cleary and her publishing company, Wyatt-MacKenzie. She strongly believed in women authors who were stay at home moms. I contacted her and the next day she asked for my manuscript and agreed to publish my book.
How has the publishing world changed since you published your first book in 1988?
The publishing world has gone through enormous changes since my first book in 1988 which I wrote on a typewriter. I was an unknown writer and after contacting 5 publishers I had a contract. Today publishing companies are being swallowed up by 2-3 large companies. Independent publishing and do-it-yourself publishing has arrived and offers new options for less known authors. Digital books have changed the playing field as well giving people a chance to be discovered via the internet.
What were the biggest challenges you faced when trying to market your book?
Marketing was a new world for me. My publisher helped me establish my platform, my brand, and my website. I wasn’t sure how to best use radio, print media, and especially social media to get as much publicity as I could for my book. My goal was to get the best exposure for the least money.
What have you done to continue to market your book?
I work on marketing daily. I do freelance articles and contribute to blogs on infertility related topics. I use HARO and Reporter connection to pitch print, tv, and radio media. I follow blogs and current news on infertility topics.
What kinds of social media do you use to build your brand?
I do social media daily. I have a Twitter site called Ioninfertility where I tweet multiple times a day. I also use Facebook as a way of promoting my book and events that I do.
What advice would you give other authors trying to get published?
Write about something you feel passionate about. Also, I entered book competitions and won 4 awards. The cost is low and I got a lot of national free press exposure as a result. Have a good website. Don’t go into it expecting to make a lot of money. Be patient and prepared to continue to promote yourself and your work.
Where can we buy this book?
My book is available on Amazon. It can be purchased through my website at www.infertilityrollercoaster.com. You can also have your local bookstore order it.
Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents
Publishers Weekly. 264.36 (Sept. 4, 2017): p85.
Copyright: COPYRIGHT 2017 PWxyz, LLC
http://www.publishersweekly.com/
Full Text:
Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents
Iris Waichler. She Writes, $16.95 trade paper
(304p) ISBN 978-1-63152-091-4
Waichler, a medical social worker, delivers an intensely personal story of observing her parents' struggles with aging and shares plenty of lessons and strategies for people who find themselves in similar caregiver roles for their aging parents. Waichler spent 35 years working with aging adults as a licensed clinical social worker, then cared for her mother as she struggled with cancer. Her experiences inform readers about topics ranging from alleviating pain to preparing for an ill person's death. Waichler discusses a different set of challenges that she faced while helping her father learn to live alone, such as advising him on when it was time to stop driving. Although the book doesn't delve deeply into any single topic, it's the ideal way to get acquainted with the myriad of issues that can arise for the children of senior parents, whether that means determining whether one's parents can still remain in their homes or taking steps to prevent identity theft. By offering so much advice about managing the difficult and even heartbreaking situations the author experienced, the book offers the reader a sense of speaking to a well-informed and personally invested friend rather than an impersonal medical professional. Additional resources, associations, and professional contacts at the back of the book supplement Waichler's hard-won advice. (BookLife)
Source Citation (MLA 8th Edition)
"Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents." Publishers Weekly, 4 Sept. 2017, p. 85. General OneFile, http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A505468131/ITOF?u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=4f19b7ff. Accessed 12 Apr. 2018.
Gale Document Number: GALE|A505468131
Role Reversal; How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents
Paige Van De Winkle
Clarion Reviews. (Dec. 22, 2016):
Copyright: COPYRIGHT 2016 ForeWord
https://www.forewordmagazine.net/clarion/reviews.aspx
Full Text:
Iris Waichler; ROLE REVERSAL; She Writes Press (Nonfiction: Family & Relationships) 16.95 ISBN: 9781631520914
Byline: Paige Van De Winkle
Role Reversal is an informative and empathetic guide on how to best care for aging parents.
Seasoned social worker Iris Waichler uses personal and occupational wisdom in Role Reversal to offer much-needed guidance on an underrepresented and increasingly important subject. With its useful resources and warm professionalism, Role Reversal is an essential read for adults thrust into the role of caregiver for their parents.
Role Reversal serves as a comprehensive and concise guide, with resources to aid in dealing with such delicate and overwhelming topics as choosing housing and determining when to take away an aging parent's license. Waichler's background as a social worker results in in-depth understanding of topics like respecting one's parent while also intervening to maintain their health and safety.
Part one uses Waichler's experiences with her terminally ill mother and as her father's caregiver to frame her compilation of resources and publications from healthcare organizations and individuals. Part two focuses solely on sources on some overlooked facets of assisting elderly parents, like estate planning and preventing identity theft.
Waichler's personal approach to the subject is humanizing and contextualizes the plethora of useful resources she packs in. By starting with her father's childhood, she emphasizes that the dignity of aging parents should be recognized and understood, as should the fine line between maintaining dignity and doing what is best as a caregiver.
One poignant moment captures this theme: While hospitalized, Waichler's father continuously becomes confused and pulls out his catheter, causing major blood loss and internal injury. After several incidents, he is restrained to his bed for his own safety. Waichler and her family are heartbroken at treating their father "like a caged animal" as he begs for the restraints to be taken off. She bravely reveals such agonizing details as an example of the difficulties of the caregiver role, as well as its supreme importance to the well-being of the elderly.
While most would likely prefer to put off dealing with the intricacies of the changing parent-child role as parents age, Waichler presents it as a challenging but rewarding experience. Despite the moments of grief and tragedy, she shows that this stage of life can also include moments of pride and togetherness.
This subject matter is intensely emotional and overwhelming, though it paradoxically requires a great deal of organization and a clear head. Waichler handles this issue excellently by offering concise resources like checklists to reference when choosing a nursing home. In its e-book form, the format is utilized to its full potential, with included hyperlinks to specific resources and websites that go more in-depth in an easily navigable way.
Iris Waichler's Role Reversal is an informative and empathetic guide on how to best care for aging parents.
Source Citation (MLA 8th Edition)
Van De Winkle, Paige. "Role Reversal; How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents." Clarion Reviews, 22 Dec. 2016. General OneFile, http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A475051334/ITOF?u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=6bd6e752. Accessed 12 Apr. 2018.
Gale Document Number: GALE|A475051334
Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster
Small Press Bookwatch. (June 2006):
Copyright: COPYRIGHT 2006 Midwest Book Review
http://www.midwestbookreview.com
Full Text:
Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster
Iris Waichler
Wyatt-MacKenzie Publishing, Inc.
15115, Hwy 36, Deadwood, OR 97430
1932279229 $17.95 wymacpublishing.com
In Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster: A Guide To Educate And Inspire, Iris Waichler draws upon her years of experience as a medical social worker to address the difficult emotional and physical health issues surrounding issue of infertility. Deftly providing readers through a sensitive understanding of the variety of infertility causes affecting men and women, Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster covers the issues of menopause, disclosure infertility and conception, parenting after infertility, how to find a doctor or lawyer, the psychology of infertility treatment, becoming a couple again, and the choice of a childless marriage. Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster is very strongly recommended for couples searching for a comprehensive grasp of infertility issues and is a complete guide to overcoming the inevitable hardships that dealing with infertility will inevitably encumber.
Source Citation (MLA 8th Edition)
"Riding The Infertility Roller Coaster." Small Press Bookwatch, June 2006. General OneFile, http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A148186650/ITOF?u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=f896c8e8. Accessed 12 Apr. 2018.
Gale Document Number: GALE|A148186650
ROLE REVERSAL
HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR AGING PARENTS
Iris Waichler
She Writes Press (Aug 16, 2016)
Softcover $16.95 (394pp)
978-1-63152-091-4
Clarion Rating: 5 out of 5
Role Reversal is an informative and empathetic guide on how to best care for aging parents.
Seasoned social worker Iris Waichler uses personal and occupational wisdom in Role Reversal to offer much-needed guidance on an underrepresented and increasingly important subject. With its useful resources and warm professionalism, Role Reversal is an essential read for adults thrust into the role of caregiver for their parents.
Role Reversal serves as a comprehensive and concise guide, with resources to aid in dealing with such delicate and overwhelming topics as choosing housing and determining when to take away an aging parent’s license. Waichler’s background as a social worker results in in-depth understanding of topics like respecting one’s parent while also intervening to maintain their health and safety.
Part one uses Waichler’s experiences with her terminally ill mother and as her father’s caregiver to frame her compilation of resources and publications from healthcare organizations and individuals. Part two focuses solely on sources on some overlooked facets of assisting elderly parents, like estate planning and preventing identity theft.
Waichler’s personal approach to the subject is humanizing and contextualizes the plethora of useful resources she packs in. By starting with her father’s childhood, she emphasizes that the dignity of aging parents should be recognized and understood, as should the fine line between maintaining dignity and doing what is best as a caregiver.
One poignant moment captures this theme: While hospitalized, Waichler’s father continuously becomes confused and pulls out his catheter, causing major blood loss and internal injury. After several incidents, he is restrained to his bed for his own safety. Waichler and her family are heartbroken at treating their father “like a caged animal” as he begs for the restraints to be taken off. She bravely reveals such agonizing details as an example of the difficulties of the caregiver role, as well as its supreme importance to the well-being of the elderly.
While most would likely prefer to put off dealing with the intricacies of the changing parent-child role as parents age, Waichler presents it as a challenging but rewarding experience. Despite the moments of grief and tragedy, she shows that this stage of life can also include moments of pride and togetherness.
This subject matter is intensely emotional and overwhelming, though it paradoxically requires a great deal of organization and a clear head. Waichler handles this issue excellently by offering concise resources like checklists to reference when choosing a nursing home. In its e-book form, the format is utilized to its full potential, with included hyperlinks to specific resources and websites that go more in-depth in an easily navigable way.
Iris Waichler’s Role Reversal is an informative and empathetic guide on how to best care for aging parents.
Reviewed by Paige Van De Winkle
December 22, 2016