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WORK TITLE: 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do
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WEBSITE: https://amymorinlcsw.com/
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https://www.linkedin.com/in/amymorinlcsw/
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HEADING: Morin, Amy
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PERSONAL
Married; husband’s name Lincoln (deceased); remarried; children: foster parent.
EDUCATION:University of Maine, B.S.W., 2001; University of New England, M.S.W., 2002.
ADDRESS
CAREER
Writer, licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, public speaker, workshop presenter, and educator. Kennebec Community College, Fairfield, ME, instructor, 2011-15; Northeastern University, Boston, MA, lecturer, 2016—. Northeast Occupational Exchange, child and family therapist, 2002-04; Kennebec Behavioral Health, child and family therapist, 2004-12; Health Access Network, psychotherapist, 2012-16.
WRITINGS
Contributor to periodicals, including Forbes, Psychology Today, Inc., and Verywell.
SIDELIGHTS
Amy Morin is a writer, psychotherapist, licensed clinical social worker, and educator. She is a lecturer at Northwestern University and a writer for prominent magazines such as Forbes, Inc., and Psychology Today. She is a frequent speaker at meetings and conferences, where she delivers keynote addresses and talks to audiences about the importance of mental strength and the ability to overcome unexpected or tragic events. She also teaches mental strengthening techniques in workshops, trainings, and online classes. She holds a bachelor’s degree in social work from the University of Maine and a master’s in social work from the University of New England.
“As a psychotherapist turned author, Amy’s mission is to make the world a stronger place,” commented a writer on the Amy Morin Website. Some of her own experiences have revealed to her the need to cultivate mental strength and resilience. She entered the field of psychotherapy as a professional sooner than many of her peers, at age twenty-one. At age twenty-three, she had become a foster parent, noted James Altucher, writing in the Huffington Post. Morin also experienced personal tragedy when her husband Lincoln died suddenly of a heart attack when Morin was twenty-six. Even in the midst of grief, however, she realized “there were things which she must not do. She knew that she must not develop a sense of entitlement, feel resentment or succumb to self-pity,” noted Bookbag reviewer Sue Magee.
Thirteen Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do
As she worked to deal with the turmoil in her life, Morin identified thirteen behaviors that separate mentally strong people from those who do not have the resilience to deal with the traumatic events in their lives. She realized that these thirteen habits were holding her back in her own life. She wrote about them in her blog, and afterward, the blog posts began spreading across the online world and increasing in popularity. These thirteen factors form the basis of Morin’s book, Thirteen Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success. In this volume, Morin provides a clear description of each of the thirteen factors and how they can be overcome to allow a person to work through personal blocks, achieve greater success, and live a happier and fuller life. She devotes an entire chapter to each of the thirteen and gives comprehensive details, a case study, and workable suggestions for implementing change.
For example, Morin notes that one of the thirteen things that mentally strong people don’t do is focus on things they can’t control. She explains the futility of this type of behavior and suggests ways that readers can redirect their focus to things that are within their ability to influence. Mentally strong also don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves; they don’t expect immediate results; and they don’t feel that the world owes them anything.
Reviewer Amal Chaaban, writing in Entrepreneur, commented: “This is a fantastic book for anyone seeking a reality check.” In California Bookwatch, a reviewer called the book a “powerful survey that’s highly recommended for anyone facing barriers to feeling life’s success.” A contributor to the website Self Help Daily concluded: “Increasing your mental strength can change your entire attitude. It takes practice and hard work, but with Morin’s specific tips, exercises, and troubleshooting advice, it is possible to not only fortify your mental muscle but also drastically improve the quality of your life.”
Thirteen Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do
Morin expands on her message of mental strength in Thirteen Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success. Here, Morin explores the thirteen “don’ts” of successful parenting. For example, she notes that mentally strong parents don’t expect perfection from their children. They don’t parent out of guilt. They don’t intervene and prevent their children from making mistakes that they can learn from. And they don’t confuse discipline with punishment.
The author includes material from research studies that support her suggestions from a scientific perspective. A Publishers Weekly writer observed: “Parents should find Morin’s work inspiring.”
BIOCRIT
PERIODICALS
California Bookwatch, May, 2017, Amy Morin, review of Thirteen Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success.
Entrepreneur, August 18, 2015, Amal Chaaban, review of Thirteen Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.
Malaysian Reserve, March 31, 2017, review of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.
Publishers Weekly, June 19, 2017, review of Thirteen Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success. p. 107.
ONLINE
Amy Morin Website, http://www.amymorinlcsw.com (April 15, 2017).
Bookbag, http://www.thebookbag.co.uk/ (April 15, 2017), review of Thirteen Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
Huffington Post, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ (October 2, 2017), James Altucher, profile of Amy Morin.
Self Help Daily, http://www.selfhelpdaily.com/ (December 17, 2014), review of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.
Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker, college psychology instructor and psychotherapist. She's a regular contributor to Forbes, Inc., Psychology Today, and Verywell.
In 2013, her article, "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," became a viral sensation when it was read by over 50 million people. Her Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestselling book, also titled "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," is being translated into 30 languages.
Her second book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do, is filled with more than 100 mental strength exercises for parents and children.
Amy's TEDx talk, the Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong, is one of the most popular TEDx talks of all time with more than 6 million views. Her advice has been featured on or in numerous media outlets including Time, Fox News, Today, Fast Company, Oprah.com, Business Insider, Success, Good Housekeeping, Elle, and Cosmopolitan.
James Altucher, Contributor
Author, entrepreneur, writer, and podcast host
Amy Morin – 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
10/02/2017 05:23 pm ET Updated Oct 04, 2017
I don’t like writers.
Stop writing advice books if you’ve never lived through it.
Just. Stop.
That’s why I asked Amy Morin, author of “13 Things Mentally Strong People DON’T Do” on my podcast (released today).
[Listen to the FULL INTERVIEW with Amy Morin]
Only someone who has been through horror and pain and tragedy would immediately hone in on the word “don’t” in her title. This told me immediately I should read the book.
Everyone else can write about all the great things that one should do. But it’s hard to remember the 87,000 good habits I should do each day.
Should I make the bed or brush my teeth first? Should I do 600 pushups and then avoid breakfast? Should I take the stairs instead of the escalator? Should I make a to-do list and then prioritize and then write down 5 things I’m grateful for?
On and on, the list of things we should do has swarmed the Internet. I’m choking on them.
I want to live a good life but I get stressed out thinking I didn’t brush my teeth eight times today or walk 20,000 steps, or call my friends twice over and remind them how much I love them.
I don’t want to rehash Amy’s tragedies. She does it in her book. She had everything going for her and then the unimaginable kept happening.
She had to learn what NOT to do in order to survive. To fully live life, one has to survive not only physically, but emotionally, creatively, and spiritually as well.
Too many people die at 25 and aren’t buried until they are 75.
Her book has the “13 Things”. But here’s 10 things I learned from talking to her.
I also learned to ask for directions. I’m sorry, Amy, how I was a fool and took you eight miles out of your way after the podcast because I refused to ask for directions.
I should’ve just said, “I don’t know”.
[Listen to the FULL INTERVIEW with Amy Morin]
1. SCHOOL ISN’T ENOUGH. YOU NEED TO DO
Amy became a therapist at 21 years old. And a foster parent by age 23. “I thought my mission in life was to teach people how to be mentally strong,” she said during our podcast conversation. “And I didn’t realize how much I was going to need mental strength.”
None of her “13 Things” can be taught in school. School teaches facts. And it teaches you to memorize facts. And it punishes you if you forget the facts.
But facts won’t help you survive the tragedies of life.
I wish school had taught me how to really live. How to be healthy. How to survive the hardest relationships. How to be creative every day. How to surrender to the things I can’t control.
2. A FEW BAD HABITS CAN DERAIL ALL GOOD HABITS
“A few bad habits can derail all good habits,” she said. She listed some bad habits:
– mentally strong people don’t feel sorry for themselves – don’t host a pity party – don’t look for sympathy
3. AVOID TOXIC PEOPLE
“You want your core people to be people who uplift you”.
Strengths and weaknesses are contagious and viral. You get to decide who you will associate with.
I was talking to a friend of mine who has finally achieved great success in his field after about 20 years. I asked him what was the “tipping point”. What finally took him over the finish line to this next area of his life?
“Recognizing the good people from the bad,” he said. “Working with those people. Connecting them. That’s a life-multiplier.”
4. DON’T WAIT UNTIL YOU FEEL BROKEN
Amy says the medical health system is broken is because we wait until we’re broken to get help.
If you ask a heart attack victim “Why did you get a heart attack” they never answer, “Clogged arteries”.
Instead they talk about stress, a broken heart, a career situation, family, and so on.
We all know instinctively that our mental health and physical health are connected. But we seldom act on this knowledge.
Avoiding this knowledge can destroy your life.
5. ALL IS NOT LOST
Amy’s mom died of a brain aneurysm. She passed away at 51 years old. Two weeks later her Dad’s house burnt down. And they lost all her mom’s possessions.
“ I had to remember those are her things but they aren’t her,” Amy said. Three years go by. Then Amy lost her husband, Lincoln, at age 26.
Every card player knows this: play the cards you are dealt. And you will often be dealt bad cards.
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This doesn’t mean the game is over. It means the people who play the best know what to do with the bad hands.
In standup comedy, not every crowd is going to laugh. But don’t blame the crowd. Learn how to lean into the silence. Take command of it. Make it meaningful.
6. DON’T AVOID
“You can’t heal if you try to avoid. You have to take care of it,” Amy said.
She told me she took time away from work. She surrounded herself with a loving community.
Trauma is a tattoo on the soul. It doesn’t wash away…
I thought back to a trauma I experienced recently. Someone close to me really hurt me. I had always been afraid to ask for help before. As if I could survive all trauma by myself. Nobody would ever need to help me!
But when I asked for “help”, I found that so many of my friends wanted the gift of being loving and useful to someone. To me.
Asking for help was like using a magic power I didn’t know I had.
7. YOU CAN ALWAYS DO SOMETHING
“It isn’t about thinking everything’s wonderful,” she said about learning how to reframe your negative thoughts, “It’s about coming up with something realistic.”
But I asked her, “Why do people always think they’re doomed?” “It’s a learned helplessness,” she said. “And it becomes a habit.”
For me, this is why I always list ten ideas a day. Even if they are bad ideas (which they almost always are). Even if I don’t execute on them (it’s BS that “execution is everything”).
I list them so that when I need them, my idea muscle is a machine that can come up with ideas when I need them.
The muse doesn’t wait for you. You have to constantly romance the muse.
8. NOBODY KNOWS ANYTHING
Key mantra: “I don’t have all the answers.”
Everyone has strong opinions these days. It’s so hard to have the opinion of, “I don’t know”. Because it’s so difficult is the reason why it’s so valuable.
9. THE LAW OF EMOTIONAL RELATIVITY
After her husband died, Amy had a client who told her, “You’ll never believe what happened while you were gone. My husband almost died of a heart attack.”
The client didn’t know Amy’s husband DID die of a heart attack. “I reminded myself that you can’t choose who’s pain is worse,” Amy said. “And overall it just helped me connect with people more.”
I try this exercise when I can. I imagine that everyone I pass on the street is my daughter.
“Don’t do that,” someone once told me when I told her I did that. “It sounds fake.”
Well, I don’t care how it sounds. That’s what I try to do.
10. LIVE LIFE LIKE IT’S EVERYONE ELSE’S LAST DAY
A friend of mine has six months to live. He’s had six months to live for the past seven years. He just celebrated his seventh “cancerversary”. He’s my age.
Instead of living life like it’s your last day, I try to live life like it’s EVERYONE ELSE’S last day.
The statistics are this: I’ve been around a good 18,000 days, give or take. It seems to me like I’ll never die. I can’t help feeling that way. 18,000 days is a lot!
But if I treat everyone else like today might be their last, then it’s like fuel for me to love them as best I can right now.
The only promise tomorrow makes is: don’t waste an opportunity to give a kiss today.
[Listen to the FULL INTERVIEW with Amy Morin]
** New episode featuring Gary Vaynerchuk. Don’t miss it! It’s coming soon. And one of the best ever podcasts. Be first to hear all his advice, subscribe now: http://apple.co/1ewcX8D **
by Taboola Sponsored Links You May Like
About Amy
As a psychotherapist turned author, Amy’s mission is to make the world a stronger place. Her education and expertise as a psychotherapist, combined with her personal experiences overcoming tragedy, give her a unique perspective on mental strength.
In 2013, Amy introduced the world to the concept of mental strength when her article, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, became an anthem read by more than 50 million people.
She’s been dubbed the “self-help guru of the moment,” by The Guardian and Forbes refers to her as a “thought leadership star.” Her advice has been featured by numerous media outlets including Time, Fast Company, Success, Business Insider, Oprah.com, Fox News, CNN, CNBC, and Today. She also appears in a Red Bull TV show called Visions of Greatness.
She lectures across the globe to provide trainings, workshops, and keynote speeches that teach people how to build their mental muscle. Students from 42 countries access her online mental strength course.
Amy’s also a lecturer at Northeastern University. She is a columnist for Forbes, Inc., and Psychology Today. She also serves as a parenting expert for Verywell.
Fast facts about Amy:
Her international best-selling book, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, is being translated into 30 languages.
With more than 6 millions views, her TEDx talk, The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong, is one of the top 30 most popular talks of all time.
Amy’s articles on mental strength reach 2 million readers every month.
Her newest book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success, teaches adults how to become mental strength coaches for children.
Amy Morin
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Amy’s mission is to make the world a stronger place. Her education and expertise as a psychotherapist, combined with her personal experiences overcoming tragedy, give her a unique perspective on mental strength. She's been dubbed "the self-help guru of the moment" by The Guardian and Inc. Magazine named her one of the top 100 speakers of 2018.
In 2013, Amy introduced the world to the concept of mental strength when her article, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do, became an anthem read by more than 50 million people. Her list was reprinted on websites like Forbes, Business Insider, Psychology Today, and Success Magazine.
Her first book, also titled 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, is a Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestseller and it's hit multiple bestseller lists around the globe. It's being translated into 30 languages.
Amy is a popular keynote speaker who provides trainings, workshops, and talks that teach people how to build their mental muscle. She also offers an online course in mental strength which is accessed by students in 42 countries.
Her TEDx talk, The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong, became one of the top 30 TEDx talks of all time after it garnered more than 6 million views shortly after its debut.
She’s a contributor to Forbes, Inc., and Psychology Today. Her articles on mental strength reach 2 million readers every month.
Her advice has been featured by media outlets such as Fast Company, Oprah.com, Fox News, CNN, Today, CNBC, and The Washington Post. She appears in seven episodes of RedBull's TV show, Visions of Greatness.
Amy is also a lecturer at Northeastern University and she serves as a parenting expert for Verywell.
Her most recent book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do, teaches parents how to become mental strength trainers. Advice from the book has been featured by major media outlets, including CNBC, Business Insider, People, Fast Company, and Fox News.
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Experience
Amy Morin, LCSW
Keynote Speaker
Company NameAmy Morin, LCSW
Dates EmployedDec 2014 – Present Employment Duration3 yrs 4 mos
I travel the globe teaching people how to build mental strength. I provide keynote speeches to athletes, executives, entrepreneurs, employees, parents, and schools. I also offer workshops and custom programs tailored to suit the needs of clients. Some of the things I talk about include the 13 things mentally strong people don't do, the 13 things mentally strong parents don't do, giving up self-limiting beliefs, and building mentally strong teams.
Northeastern University
Lecturer
Company NameNortheastern University
Dates EmployedMar 2016 – Present Employment Duration2 yrs 1 mo
LocationBoston, MA
HarperCollins
Author
Company NameHarperCollins
Dates EmployedJan 2014 – Present Employment Duration4 yrs 3 mos
LocationNew York, NY
I'm the author of two books:
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do, an international bestselling book that is being translated into 29 languages (HarperCollins, 2014)
Author of 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Do, a guide that teaches parents how to become mental strength coaches for their kids (HarperCollins, 2017)
And my next book will be released in 2019.
I speak to international audiences about mental strength. From private schools to professional athletes, I offer skills and tools to help people build the mental muscle they need to reach their greatest potential.
Verywell, an About.com company
Parenting Expert
Company NameVerywell, an About.com company
Dates EmployedJun 2012 – Present Employment Duration5 yrs 10 mos
I write health-related articles about parenting--especially child discipline and behavior.
Health Access Network
Psychotherapist
Company NameHealth Access Network
Dates EmployedSep 2012 – 2016 Employment Duration4 yrs
LocationLincoln, ME
I provide cognitive behavioral therapy to adults, childrens, and teens at a health center.
Kennebec Valley Community College
Instructor
Company NameKennebec Valley Community College
Dates EmployedAug 2011 – Dec 2015 Employment Duration4 yrs 5 mos
LocationFairfield, ME
I teach a variety of online, hybrid and in-person classes. Classes I have taught include:
Introduction to Psychology
Substance Abuse with Special Populations
Case Management
The Changing Workplace
Introduction to Community Mental Health
Kennebec Behavioral Health
LCSW - Child and Family Therapist
Company NameKennebec Behavioral Health
Dates EmployedDec 2004 – Sep 2012 Employment Duration7 yrs 10 mos
I provided outpatient and school based therapy for adults and children using cognitive-behavior therapy as the primary treatment modality.
Northeast Occupational Exchange
Child and Family Therapist
Company NameNortheast Occupational Exchange
Dates EmployedJun 2002 – Dec 2004 Employment Duration2 yrs 7 mos
LocationNewport, ME
I provided cognitive behavioral therapy to children and adolescents and I facilitated parenting groups.
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Print Marked Items
13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't
Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and
Training Their Brains for a Life of
Happiness, Meaning, and Success
Publishers Weekly.
264.25 (June 19, 2017): p107.
COPYRIGHT 2017 PWxyz, LLC
http://www.publishersweekly.com/
Full Text:
13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for
a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success
Amy Morin. Morrow, $26.99 (352p) ISBN 978-0-06-256573-0
Psychotherapist Moran's worthy follow-up to 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do extends her dosand-don'ts
formula to parenting. Each chapter examines one don't, such as don't "condone a victim
mentality," "parent out of guilt," "expect perfection," "prevent [your] child from making mistakes," or
"confuse discipline with punishment." And each chapter opens with an anecdote illustrative of the identified
problem; contains signs to recognize, new dos to adopt, and sections on different ages; and wraps up with a
troubleshooting summary. For example, in "They Don't Make Their Child the Center of the Universe,"
Morin discusses how people trying to avoid mistakes their own parents made often use excessive praise
with their kids, unintentionally nurturing narcissism instead of healthy self-esteem. Her combination of
common sense backed by research--amply cited--will help parents make a midcourse correction. While the
title focuses on the negative, the book itself accentuates the positive. Parents should find Morin's work
inspiring. Agent: Stacey Glick, Dystel & Goderich. (Sept.)
Source Citation (MLA 8th
Edition)
"13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don't Do: Raising Self-Assured Children and Training Their Brains for
a Life of Happiness, Meaning, and Success." Publishers Weekly, 19 June 2017, p. 107. General
OneFile, http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A496643923/ITOF?
u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=0005322c. Accessed 24 Mar. 2018.
Gale Document Number: GALE|A496643923
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13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't
Do
Amy Morin
California Bookwatch.
(May 2017):
COPYRIGHT 2017 Midwest Book Review
http://www.midwestbookreview.com
Full Text:
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears,
and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success is a powerful survey that's highly recommended for
anyone facing barriers to feeling life's success, and comes from a psychotherapist who shares her tips on
how to gather mental strength and recognize self-induced obstacles to empowerment and joy. The title
stems from a blog the author wrote which outlined the 13 habits that held her back from her own success.
Her blog went vital and its message was so powerful that she racked up viewers and articles on big-name
sites. Anecdotes from her work as a psychology instructor and psychotherapist pair with excellent insights
anyone can use to make their lives more meaningful.
Amy Morin
William Morrow & Company
c/o HarperCollins Publishers
195 Broadway New York, New York 10007
9780062358301, $16.99, www.harpercollins.com
Source Citation (MLA 8th
Edition)
Morin, Amy. "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do." California Bookwatch, May 2017. General
OneFile, http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A496014802/ITOF?
u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=74288bee. Accessed 24 Mar. 2018.
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Health, Mind & Body
Publishers Weekly.
265.4 (Jan. 22, 2018): p16.
COPYRIGHT 2018 PWxyz, LLC
http://www.publishersweekly.com/
Full Text:
Health, Mind & Body
RANK TITLE AUTHOR
1 The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Mark Manson
2 28 Days of Clean Eating --
3 The Happiness Project Gretchen Rubin
4 You Are a Badass Jen Sincere
5 Simply Keto Suzanne Ryan
6 The Super Metabolism Diet Zinczenko/Mayo
7 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do Amy Morin
8 The Secret Rhonda Byrne
9 Clean Gut Alejandro Junger
10 Howto Win Friends and Influence People Dale Carnegie
RANK IMPRINT ISBN
1 HarperOne 9780062457738
2 Sonoma 9781942411031
3 Harper 9780062474247
4 Running Press 9780762448319
5 Victory Belt 9781628602968
6 Ballantine 9781524796631
7 Morrow 9780062358318
8 Beyond Words 9781416554998
9 HarperOne 9780062075895
10 Simon & Schuster 9781451621716
Source Citation (MLA 8th
Edition)
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http://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A525839732/ITOF?u=schlager&sid=ITOF&xid=a635cec0.
Accessed 24 Mar. 2018.
Gale Document Number: GALE|A525839732
Book Review: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do By Amy Morin
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Amal Chaaban
- Guest Writer
August 18, 2015 1 min read
Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
You're reading Entrepreneur Middle East, an international franchise of Entrepreneur Media.
At first glance, this is the farthest thing from a book that applies to corporate culture, but a deeper read shows that it is a great self-improvement tool. Morin’s advice will, by default, also improve your performance at the office. Using the tools she has developed as a psychotherapist, the author provides a list of 13 things that people who are mentally strong don’t do- ranging from quelling self pity (“They don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves”) to patience as a virtue (“They don’t expect immediate results”). This writer’s favourite is number 12: “They don’t feel the world owes them anything.” Each chapter delves further into the header, and provides positive and forward-thinking tactics on how to fix your flaw in logic. This is a fantastic book for anyone seeking a reality check.
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do by Amy Morin
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do by Amy Morin
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Buy 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do by Amy Morin at Amazon.co.uk or Amazon.com
Category: Popular Science
Rating: 5/5
Reviewer: Sue Magee
Reviewed by Sue Magee
Summary: Thirteen habits which can weaken us mentally examined and then countered, with anecdotes to illustrate what has gone wrong. Very easy reading without a hint of jargon. Highly recommended.
Buy? Yes Borrow? Yes
Pages: 320 Date: January 2015
Publisher: Harper Thorson
External links: Author's website
ISBN: 978-0008105938
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When Amy Morin was just 26 and working as a psychologist and therapist her husband died suddenly, but even whilst she was reeling from the shock she realised that there were things which she must not do. She knew that she must not develop a sense of entitlement, feel resentment or succumb to self-pity. That was ten years ago: since then Morin has remarried and worked with numerous patients using the principles which she applied to herself. She's found 13 common habits which hold us back in life and developed strategies to combat them. But the best thing which she makes clear is that mental strength is not about acting tough - for instance, if you've suffered a bereavement, you need to grieve - it's about having the mental wherewithal to overcome life's challenges.
If this all sounds rather 'new age' or even a bit complicated, don't worry. Each habit which mentally strong people don't do has a chapter to itself and begins with a case study which demonstrates what is happening and the effect that this has on someone's life: it makes the problem feel very real. This is followed by some examples of how this might manifest itself in the reader, with a range which takes in the worst to the least-worst ways that you might experience the problem. Occasionally I read through the examples, happy that I didn't (currently) fall into any of the traps but then found an example which made me sit up and think. I don't suffer from jealousy, but I'm not completely immune to having a snigger when a celebrity falls flat on their face (but obviously only when said celebrity fully deserves their comeuppance...).
After the examples we move on to the reasons why we do these things and why they're so destructive. The nitty gritty is obviously how to get out of the habits - how to behave, how to replace the negative thoughts with the positive ones which will lift your mood. This section is usually quite extensive and you'll find your mind pushed into all sorts of corners which it might not have visited for a while. On one or two sections where I felt that I was at risk (no - I'm not going to tell you...) I went back and read this part again and some of the pages are bookmarked. Each chapter finishes with troubleshooting hints and guidance as to what's helpful and what's not helpful.
It's very easy reading without even a hint of jargon. If you'd like an overview of the thirteen problems have a look at Morin's website, but for the detail on how to counter them I think you'll need the book. I'd like to thank the publisher for sending a copy to the Bookbag.
For ways to look after your body we can recommend Eat. Nourish. Glow.: 10 easy steps for losing weight, looking younger and feeling healthier by Amelia Freer. For another look at how you act have a look at The Test Book: 64 Tools to Lead You to Success by Mikael Krogerus and Roman Tschappeler.
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Review: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
December 17, 2014 by Joi 3 Comments
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do Review
I love it when I’m sent a book to review and I, literally, have trouble putting it down. 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do by Amy Morin is the latest book to fit this description.
I’ll tell you what reading it reminded me of: Sitting in a Baptist Church in the South on a Sunday morning as the Man of God in front of the congregation was on FIRE! He paces and preaches and preaches and paces – the whole time leaving you thinking things like, “That’s right!,” “That’s SO GOOD!,” and “AMEN!”
I’ve had the supreme privilege and honor of sitting in many Sunday morning services just like that. They’re downright tingly to your body, mind, and spirit because they serve as wonderful wake up calls.
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do is a wake up call in its own right. I can’t say that it stirs the Spirit necessarily, but that’s not what it’s setting out to do. THIS particular wake-up call stirs your mind and even your heart.
And does so with aplomb.
Expanding on her viral post that has become an international phenomenon, a psychotherapist offers simple yet effective solutions for increasing mental strength and finding happiness and success in life.
As a licensed clinical social worker, college psychology instructor, and psychotherapist, Amy Morin has seen countless people choose to succeed despite facing enormous challenges. That resilience inspired her to write 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, a web post that instantly went viral, and was picked up by the Forbes website.
Morin’s post focused on the concept of mental strength, how mentally strong people avoid negative behaviors—feeling sorry for themselves, resenting other people’s success, and dwelling on the past. Instead, they focus on the positive to help them overcome challenges and become their best.
In this inspirational, affirmative book, Morin expands upon her original message, providing practical strategies to help readers avoid the thirteen common habits that can hold them back from success. Combining compelling anecdotal stories with the latest psychological research, she offers strategies for avoiding destructive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors common to everyone.
Like physical strength, mental strength requires healthy habits, exercise, and hard work. Morin teaches you how to embrace a happier outlook and arms you to emotionally deal with life’s inevitable hardships, setbacks, and heartbreaks—sharing for the first time her own poignant story of tragedy, and how she summoned the mental strength to move on. As she makes clear, mental strength isn’t about acting tough; it’s about feeling empowered to overcome life’s challenges.
Each chapter goes into great (eye-opening) detail about the pitfalls of the 13 things successful people do not do. As you read through the book, you will (given the fact that you look human to me) recognize yourself in a few scenarios.
This is a good thing! WHEN you realize bad habits or choices, THEN you’re able to give yourself a good old-fashioned kick in the seat of the pants and vow never to go down that dead end road again.
That’s why I call these moments wake up calls. They sound off alarms that help you shake out of a deep sleep and get moving in the right direction.
Amy Morin has put together an absolutely wonderful book that reads fast but leaves a lasting impression. Since I read it (a few weeks ago), I’ve often thought of her words.
Chapter 4: They Don’t Focus on Things They Can’t Control
“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” – Maya Angelou
One of my favorite chapters in the book addresses the fact that Successful People Don’t Focus on Things They Can’t Control. Not only would it be a colossal waste of time and energy to focus on things you cannot control – it sucks time and energy AWAY that could actually be productive.
“It feels so safe to have everything under control, but thinking we have the power to always pull the strings can become problematic.” (Page 74)
The chapter includes examples and “symptoms” of this type of thinking.
“We can’t possibly make all of our circumstances and all the people in our lives fit into the way we think things should be. When you learn to let go of the details you can’t control, the amount of time and energy you’ll be able to devote to the things you can control will give you the ability to accomplish incredible feats.” (Page 75)
How great is that?!
This one chapter, alone, should be required reading for everyone in the world. If you cannot control it… let it go. Not only will everyone else around you be happier, you’ll be freer.
As I read through this chapter, I thought of a few modern-day illustrations of this bad habit.
Women who call or text their boyfriends/husbands again and again and again while he is on the golf course, fishing, watching a game, etc. If the truth came out…. they don’t want them THERE! They want them where they want them and yet, somehow, lost control of the situation. He wandered away! What’s a gal to do? She can retain a little bit of control by keeping tabs on him. Personally, I think a trip to Target would be a lot funner, but that’s just me.
This one’s timely – how about holiday get-togethers? Tension often runs high because every family has that one person who acts as though no one EVER does enough for them. They’re sour and resentful because they’re unable to control what everyone else says and does.
Anyone with co-workers knows how maddening control freaks can be. They aren’t the least bit interested in being a team player because they want to be the puppet master. They want to tell everyone else what “their job” is while refusing to let any “job descriptions” stick to them!
The list goes on, of course. This is one of the most powerful chapters in the book -but each chapter is profoundly powerful.
I know that 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do is a book you’ll love. Even more importantly, I know it’s a book you’ll get A LOT out of. One of the first things I thought after I finished the book was, “The phrase game changer is woefully overused… heck, I overuse it on a gruesome level… THIS book truly is a game changer and could help SO MANY PEOPLE!”
I thought it then and I think it now. You need this book. Period.
On December 23, you’ll be able to buy 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do on Amazon. Click through and pre-order it now!
~ Joi
From the Inside Cover
The Ultimate Guide to Mastering Your Mental Strength
Everyone knows that regular exercise and weight training lead to physical strength. But how do we strengthen ourselves mentally for the truly tough times? And what should we do when we face these challenges? Or as psychotherapist Amy Morin asks, what should we avoid when we encounter adversity? Through her years counseling others and her own experiences navigating personal loss, Morin realized it is often the habits we cannot break that are holding us back from true success and happiness. Indulging in self-pity, agonizing over things beyond our control, obsessing over past events, resenting the achievements of others, or expecting immediate positive results holds us back. This list of things mentally strong people don’t do resonated so much with readers that when it was picked up by Forbes.com it received ten million views.
Now, for the first time, Morin expands upon the thirteen things from her viral post and shares her tried-and-true practices for increasing mental strength. Morin writes with searing honesty, incorporating anecdotes from her work as a college psychology instructor and psychotherapist as well as personal stories about how she bolstered her own mental strength when tragedy threatened to consume her.
Increasing your mental strength can change your entire attitude. It takes practice and hard work, but with Morin’s specific tips, exercises, and troubleshooting advice, it is possible to not only fortify your mental muscle but also drastically improve the quality of your life.
About the Author
Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker, college psychology instructor, and psychotherapist. She is the only person in the psychology industry who is talking about mental strength on a global level. She lives in Enfield, Maine.
Book Review: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
Friday, March 31st, 2017 at , Life & Art | Trends
Title: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
Author: Amy Morin
Publisher: HarperThorsons
This book started as an online post by a psychotherapist that soon became viral. Forbes picked it up and soon new author Amy Morin has a book deal and international fame. It’s one of those Internet success stories that travelled to the physical world.
Good for Morin! But what about the book?
Well, it’s exactly like the Internet post she did, only this time she has a whole book to expand and explain each “don’ts”. A sampling of “don’ts” include — don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself and don’t feel the world owes you anything.
Morin expands on each “don’t” by including a story example, checklists to identify elements, and analysis on why we feel sorry for ourselves, for example. Then she provides suggestions on how to break each negative habit.
It’s a proper self-help book on its own and even people who have never heard or read Morin’s “listicle” may find this book helpful.
Her background as a psychotherapist definitely helps Morin’s approach as she displays an understanding of the human psyche as she dissects each negative habit adequately and the motivations behind each situation.